How to Play Minecraft, Valheim, and ARK with Friends: Every Method Compared
Want to play with friends but not sure where to start? There are more options than most guides let on — and the “best” one depends entirely on your group size, budget, and how much setup you’re willing to do. This guide breaks down every method so you can pick the right one in a few minutes, no tech background required.
Quick Answer: Which Method Should You Use?
- Playing with 1-3 close friends casually? → Built-in multiplayer (free, easiest)
- Want a persistent world that’s always online, minimal effort? → Paid hosting
- Comfortable with basic tech setup and want full control, no monthly fees? → Self-hosting
- Just want to jump into a game with strangers? → Public servers
Still not sure? Keep reading — each method is broken down below.
Method 1: Built-In Multiplayer (No Server Needed)
Most modern games include a simple way to invite friends directly, no server setup required.
How it works: You host the world from your own game session, and friends join directly through an invite or LAN connection. Minecraft’s “Friends” feature (via Xbox Live) and Realms-style direct invites are the most common examples.
Pros:
- Completely free
- Zero technical setup
- Works in minutes
Cons:
- The host’s game must stay open — if they log off, everyone gets disconnected
- Limited to smaller groups (usually 2-8 players depending on the game)
- World only exists on the host’s device/save file
- Performance depends on the host’s internet upload speed and hardware
Best for: Casual sessions with a few friends who play at the same time.
Method 2: Public Servers
Thousands of community-run servers are already online and free to join — you don’t need any friends already playing to jump in.
How it works: Use a server list site (like Minecraft Server List or similar directories for other games) to browse public servers by game mode, region, or player count, then connect using the server’s IP address.
Pros:
- Free and instant — just find an IP and connect
- Huge variety of game modes, communities, and rule sets
- No commitment or setup
Cons:
- No control over rules, other players, or server uptime
- Quality varies wildly — some servers are poorly moderated or laggy
- Not ideal if you want a private world just for your friend group
Best for: Meeting new people, trying different game modes, or when you don’t need a private world.
Safety tip: Stick to well-known, reputable server lists and avoid entering personal information or downloading anything a server asks you to install outside the game itself.
Method 3: Paid Server Hosting
A hosting company runs the server for you on their hardware, 24/7, for a monthly fee.
How it works: You sign up with a hosting provider (like Minecraft Realms, Apex Hosting, Shockbyte, or similar services depending on the game), pick a plan based on player count, and they handle the technical side. You just get an IP address to share with friends.
Pros:
- Always online — no need to keep your own PC running
- No technical setup or maintenance
- Reliable uptime and support if something breaks
- Easy to scale player slots up or down
Cons:
- Recurring monthly cost (typically $5-20+/month depending on player count and game)
- Less control than self-hosting — you’re limited to what the provider allows
- Cancel the subscription and your world may become inaccessible unless you back it up yourself
Best for: Groups who want a reliable, always-on world without dealing with any technical setup, and don’t mind paying for convenience.
Method 4: Self-Hosting
You run the server yourself on your own hardware at home.
How it works: Using a mini PC, old desktop, or Raspberry Pi, you install server software (commonly via Docker for simplicity) and configure port forwarding so friends can connect from outside your network.
Pros:
- No recurring subscription cost — one-time hardware investment
- Full control over settings, mods, backups, and uptime schedule
- Good learning experience if you’re into tech/networking
- Can host multiple games on the same hardware
Cons:
- Requires upfront technical setup (though it’s easier than it sounds)
- Server only runs when your hardware is on — no built-in redundancy unless you set it up
- Home internet upload speed and stability matter
- You’re responsible for troubleshooting if something breaks
Best for: Anyone comfortable with basic tech setup who wants long-term control and no monthly fees — especially good if you already have spare hardware lying around.
Cost Comparison at a Glance
| Method | Setup Difficulty | Ongoing Cost | Uptime Control |
|---|---|---|---|
| Built-in multiplayer | None | Free | Host must stay online |
| Public servers | None | Free | No control |
| Paid hosting | Easy | $5-20+/mo | Provider-managed, reliable |
| Self-hosting | Moderate | ~$0 after hardware | Fully yours |
Which Should You Actually Pick?
If you’re just testing the waters with a small group, start with built-in multiplayer — it costs nothing and takes minutes. If that starts feeling limiting (world resets, host has to stay online, small player cap), paid hosting is the natural next step if you’d rather not deal with setup. If you want full control and don’t mind a bit of technical work upfront, self-hosting pays for itself over time and gives you the most flexibility.
Ready to dig into a specific method? Check out the detailed guides:
- How to Set Up a Minecraft Server at Home
- Minecraft Realms vs Self-Hosting: Which Should You Choose?
- Best Paid Minecraft Server Hosting Services (Compared)
- How to Find and Join Public Minecraft Servers